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Poetry Weekly
 

 

B.T Shaw lives in Oregon, where she teaches at the University of Portland and Portland State University. She edits the Poetry column for The Oregonian (which, in this economic atmosphere, seems like a gravity-defying feat). This Dirty Little Heart (Eastern Washington University Press, 2008) is her first book. Her poems sometimes appear in print and online journals. And sometimes she can be found at poetry@news.oregonian.com.

This Dirty Little Heart
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And When I Hear That Voice I Feel a Great Joy  

They say it doesn’t strike twice. But lightning is plural.

A chorus. One hundred touches per second. One hundred

tales in illegible cursive—each particular

 

                        as a girl in a crowd, my mother,

maybe, seeking relief from afternoon heat

close as skin. Hand over hand

 

in LaSourdesville Lake, out to a water-bound

merry-go-round—metal rod circled with rings—

from which children would twirl, swing, spin

into thin moments of flight, releasing to arc

beyond gravity’s hand, thrill in the pause

before falling. That day

 

            the sky darkened, my mother ignored voices

from shore. And here

 

            my grandmother wades into the story, hitching

her skirt, dragging her daughter to shelter, both lit

with anger. And lightning—

 

that liar—

 

            struck twice, arcing the merry-go-round.

Two touches. One body. She washed to the shore,

another twelve-year-old girl who believed she could ride

out the storm. My mother

 

            stood by the side of a pool in the rain,

telling this story. Charred, she said, and I felt it,

a fulgurite under my skin. Path of lightning—

through grandma, my mother, a stranger, myself.

 

I’ve heard church bells in France once sang

to scare away lightning. Even then, in an ocean

of polled wood, a girl—

 

lifting her eyes to the harrowing sky,

waiting for voices.

A word from the poet about "And When I Hear That Voice I Feel a Great Joy"

The first draft of this poem was written when Richard Einhorn’s Voices of Light was in heavy rotation on my student-budget boom box. At Elliot Bay Books in Seattle, I found a copy of Willard Trask’s translation of Joan of Arc’s testimony (Joan of Arc: In Her Own Voice), and I bought it with some holiday cash.

The voices—those that guide us, those that strike us—are what kept me working on this poem for, literally, years.

Or how about this: I grew up in Ohio. There were stories and a lot of lightning.